Just another sorority girl

The Seattle Yacht Club

Last night was a pretty rare occasion for us.  We don’t usually go out, and we certainly never splurge.  Last night we did both.  It wasn’t a normal date night; it was the Puget Sound Association Phi Beta Kappa Chapter’s 60^th Anniversary dinner.  Dr. John Churchill, secretary of the national Phi Beta Kappa Society was the guest speaker and the event was at the Seattle Yacht Club.  This might not seem like a big deal, but it kind of was.

Dr. John Churchill inspired both Duane and me with his speech about higher education.

Most people when I tell them I am a Phi Bete, which I rarely do for this reason alone, think I am just another sorority girl.  Nothing against sororities, but Phi Beta Kappa isn’t one—it’s the nation’s oldest academic honor society.  It’s kind of a big deal.

Requirements for nomination are tough.  Less than 10 percent of the nation’s universities have a chapter and less than 10 percent of students at those universities are nominated for membership.  I was inducted in 2002, my senior year at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville.  I’m fairly certain if you knew anything about my past, you would know this was probably one of the proudest moments of my life.

Duane and I at an Airman Leadership School graduation

At any rate, when the opportunity to attend this dinner came up, I asked Duane if we could go.  I say “asked” because I know it isn’t in our budget, and I knew I’d have to buy a dress since we haven’t been to an event like this in ages.  Spend almost ten years in the military and see what happens to your wardrobe.  The nice thing about being in the military is any time there is a function, you can wear your service dress. 

I made a pretty good Flapper at a Decades party

We weren’t quite sure what to expect since Seattle is fairly laid back.  People wear leather and cargo pants to the opera.  No joke.  And no one stares.  It’s Seattle.  That said, I didn’t want anyone to stare at me for being over- or under-dressed.  Call me paranoid.  I wasn’t all that excited about shopping.  I hate shopping.  Last time I had to calculate on this level what I was going to wear was for a decades farewell party.  Everyone chose the 70s or 80s because it was easy; we chose the 20s.  It goes without saying if there was a costume contest, we would have won.  We looked awesome.  It isn’t that easy anymore to just slip into something comfortable.  Shoe shopping is a special kind of torture—not only are they extremely expensive, but I will only wear them once and I immediately regret my decision to be wearing any shoes about 14 steps into the evening.  In Mississippi, I just wore capri pants and flip-flops and looked fabulous.  Four pregnancies, 11 rounds of hormone-laden fertility treatments and two surgeries later, things don’t fit me like they did then.

Jessica Simpson can kiss my ass if she thinks I am going to wear these shoes for longer than five seconds.

Duane and I both managed to get through the formalities of trying very hard to look like we hadn’t tried hard at all to fit in at this event.  We had no idea what to expect or who would show up with their A-game for networking.  Turns out, we shared a table with the University of Washington’s provost, a World War II veteran, and a brand spanking new member of Phi Beta Kappa.  The best part about it all, is as I tried to practice my conversation skills, I played the “Who is the Phi Bete” game and learned every single man at the table was the spouse, not the Phi Bete.  Even the woman married to the WWII veteran—she was the scholar.  Girl power!

Our tablemates.  He is a WWII veteran, she is a Puget Sound Association Phi Beta Kappa Chapter past president.

At the end of the night, I felt like a piece of me had returned.  It was a piece that has been missing for a long time, and that piece is the fighter in me who worked full-time while going to college full-time.  It’s the woman who became a woman, not by wearing pretty clothes or learning how to do my own makeup, but by reading books, studying and learning how to argue and defend my beliefs.  Last night reminded me how I got here: by spending five years of my life working my ass off, nose in the books, learning, determined to make a better life for myself and my future family.  When we first moved to Seattle, people assumed we moved for Duane’s job.  I watched their faces turn to embarrassment when they would learn it was my job we moved for.  Last night I realized just how far I’ve come and how much farther I can go.  The American Dream is still alive and well and I am proof of that.